I am very happy that I life in a time and place where I can be who I am. I am openly bisexual and I haven’t really had to deal with real discrimination, I am really glad I haven’t. There are a lot of places in the world where it is a lot worse and I really want to acknowledge that before you read on.
The law in my country (The Netherlands) prohibits discrimination against the lgbt+ community, but being part of this community can be hard at sometimes. I can’t be fired for being who I am and I am allowed to marry whomever I want, so the problem clearly doesn’t lay by the law. The problem lays with the people, begin gay or lesbian or trans is still seen as weird. People still are expected to act like their gender, whatever that should mean, and if they don’t it is strange and is actually not something that you want.
Amongst men, man are still expected to act masculine and if you don’t act like that you are called gay and you don’t want to be called gay. I think that using the word gay like a derogatory term really make people want to distance their self from it. But the most strange thing is that the people that use these words are not at all homophobic. Some of my friends used to call each other “gay” and they were all okay with me. They knew me and they just knew it wasn’t a big deal, it was me and it wasn’t like I was this whole other person.
Still, I knew that if they could see I was bi from the beginning that they would be weary of becoming friend with them. I first had to prove that I could be one of them that me being bi was accepted.
I don’t want to say that my life is hard and that being bisexual has a big negative effect on me, I just want to say that we are still not there yet. begin lesbian, gay, bi or trans is still something seen as strange and it shouldn’t. We have come far and I hope that even in a world that much resembles a dumpster fire, we can go even further.